i want somebody but not just anybody

it is one of the things and it seems so major to me, this is why iv never obviously spoken about it, but it seems like it's the 'in thing' i dunno

I have a chubby face. I am chubby.

my whole everything is in a constant decline with no end in sight

She is perfect she is

dear classics class yal are fun, its actually me on the right if you dont know

Watch me fall, watch me fall down...
There's an aching in my skin
I wanna get out, wanna get out
Out of mind
Out of time

They say, "People grow, let it go. time will heal your bleeding wounds"
But I don't think it's gonna work out that easy.

Falling slowly, sing your melody

Take this sinking boat and point it home, we still have time.
Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice.
You've made it now.

wait

i hope you find it beause i could not find it in me

this cant win, i can't stay. its all uphill from here.

but everythings cool as long as im getting thinner

struggling

Ali: "Armenia can we have toast?"
Armenia: "No Ali it's not Toast O'clock yet!"
(4.30am ish)
I love Amrenia we have so much fun walking around being silly at early hours

I think I didn't do much last night but dance and drink and dance and be happy and have closure finally about the stuff which is so good this makes me so happy because i know it happend coz of the mirror

Intensely happy

Last night was so intensely amazing I think it was possibly the most amazing thing in the world I'm trying to remember it all but I can't

I know that it all happened though because me and Armenia wrote it all down on her mirror with a vivid so in the morning we wouldn't forget.

The things concerning the stuff is like wow come on ali why do you block out the memories that you know you want to keep forever? It's because those are the memories that I'm scared weren't in fact the exact way I think they are.

But this time I know it all happened because we wrote it down on Armenia's mirror with vivid

CAN NOT EVEN BELIEVE.








P.S You guys are so beautiful i love yal omg

Yaaaay this weekend will be gooood!
Tomorrow I'm going cheap clothes shopping with Armenia and then staying at hers after The Ruby Suns gig and it'll be fuuuun.

I got new jandals, they are Fruju Fruit Whip Ice Cream ones! AWESOME

Then on Sunday I'm taking Monty to Mcleans Island

Then on monday we all wanted to go to the Health and Die Die Die gig but it's R18, and we were planning to just go but I don't want to have to lie to mum,,,,,

Tonight me and Jo and Eva went to the Shakespear play in Mona Vale and it was fun and we ate Ravioli but I didn't understand the play AT ALL hahahaah

Criminal Minds and Project Runway tonight!

High School Musical on stage last night was SO GOOD OMG IT MADE ME SO HAPPY
:D
I wish it was like the original cast from the movie haha omg imagine if Zac Efron was in my city I might die and go to heaven *content*

Preoccupied

I see now I'm doing to her what yal did to me, woops

Intruiging

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Disorder:	Low
Schizoid Disorder:	Low
Schizotypal Disorder:	Low
Antisocial Disorder:	Low
Borderline Disorder:	Very High
Histrionic Disorder:	High
Narcissistic Disorder:	Low
Avoidant Disorder:	Moderate
Dependent Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	Moderate
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! -- -- Personality Disorders --

I can hear my train coming, I'm still running for my life

Tegan and Sara, oh how I've missed you

This all seems so untrue

up and over it and over them

do you mind

Today I didn't go to school again, it was nice. I rode and cleaned and ate my brothers chocolates ^^
My room and ensuite is spotless, its a shame I don't live in it anymore! My sleepout is a lot better anyway.
Sofie might be coming up from Queenstown this weekend omg it'll be so good!!!

Darlin' I'll be yours forever coz' I never wanna be without love

This movie makes me so happy!

look what i noticed

You are strong on the inside but you portray weakness because it gives you attention. This is expected as you are a performer. You depend on it, it keeps you going.

I'm strong on the outside to stop people seeing what I really am underneath.
Because under this gaurded pretense I'm not much to look at.

Please help

me

Janeinside

Today I bought a book

don't think i'm pushing you away when you're the one that i've kept closest

This makes me happy

Yay Mum is getting me a frankie Magazine subscription for my birthday!

i find shelter in this way

wait, WHAT

Why does it always have to be awkward, why can't it be enough that we're just friends!
I did like you once upon a time but it's just.so.awkward

Froze by desire

is this me exercising?

I also just went for a 12km bike ride, I feel good

this is finally coming together

Today I couldn't face school so I went and watched Rosanna riding at the Show Jumping Champs and got quite sunburnt.
This weekend will be so intensely good I think. I feel I need something to get me going again, like to get being all happy and positive like I usually am!

I've actually been invited somewhere tomorrow! It's a strange feeling, not having to ask. I'm such an organiser, but I like this more, obvsly.

I cant wait for Kaikoura, I havn't been there in so long. I used to live there actually. It's so pretty!

Time's tide will smother you

Joanna Casey

'No one can catch me the way that you catch me, no one can keep me when I'm out out time like you'. Thank you for everything. Thank you for just being around. You are such a good friend, don't think it goes unnoticed.

hello today

i can't possibly want others around me when i don't even want myself. i don't like you ali aikin.
but then there's you, andyou've always been my exception

alas i will try harder to be GOODER.

*panic

happy in a drunken haze but heaven knows i'm miserable now

in the time i've known you i never thought you were anything less than perfect even in all your faults

what

hello

you cloud cloud cloud my head but it could be worse

This was such a good weekend,!

and now i'm hungry

Watching the winter grow so old

anyone feeling crap should listen to meg & dia,
i love it
everything relates

Hello Honeypuffs

I don't understand why you get to have the this amazing talent that I, for one, would kill for, and you hardly appreciate it apart from the times when you get told how amazing you are.

You put little enthusiam into it and constantly complain.
I can't stand it when you do this.
I actually want to learn and enjoy going to rehearsals and practicing at home.
If I ever get the chance to sing with you I'll at least know you can work towards something you really want, even if it doesn't seem a realistic dream.

Today, more than others, I can't even bare to look at your face. You enrage me.
The only reason I haven't told you this is becuase if you leave my mother there would be nothing. No money.
You are rude and I don't like you.

my nerves will be the death of meeeee i knowwww dodoodododooooododoododooo

this town is no longer mine it's fucked with me for the last time. i will strike a match and burn away every tie that binds me to this place, and how i wish that i could see your face

finally!